Calving Season Part 1

If you read my books, I beg your pardon because you’ve heard this one before.

Teacher: Who can tell me how many seasons there are?

Student: Four.

Teacher: Very good. Can you name the seasons?

Student: Yes, ma’am. Calving Season. Breeding Season. Haying Season. And Feeding Season.

Most cattle producers keep a tally book. Entries at calving time include birth date, calf weight, sex, and calving ease recorded as a score of 1 to 5. 1. No assistance. 2. Human assistance. 3. Mechanical assistance. 4. Cesarean section. 5. Malposition. While most cows lie down and pop out a calf unaided, once in a while Mother Nature throws a curve. A couple days ago, we had a breech calf. With a little muscle power, the calf came out just fine. The score was 5, reflecting a malposition. The strangest presentation I ever attended was upside down and backward. After extracting that calf, we thought the scoring rubric should go higher. It seemed to require at least a 12 in effort.

Calves normally present in what I call Dive Position with the front toes appearing first. By the time the front legs protrude a few inches, a nose appears tucked in neatly above them. If progress stops here, we loop each end of an obstetric chain around each leg and, in coordination with the cow’s contractions, provide gentle traction. Note: “gentle traction” is often accompanied by a lot of grunting and groaning. Sometimes the cow emits some noises, too. If we help the cow in this fashion, she gets a score of 2. If we have to use a calf jack, she gets a 3.